Going with my Gut: A Journey to Wellness

I'm trying a different format in this post because sometimes life is a series of moments and they are connected simply because they are your story. My blog looks different too - it was time for a change :) Here are some scenes since my last update 6 weeks ago, in somewhat chronological order... SCENE: Watching the sun set on the porch in Wellfleet. Purples, pinks, and yellows. Enjoying a summer night with wet hair and a sweatshirt. SCENE: Kayaking on the Charles for Fathers Day. Risking no bathroom in close proximity. Arm muscles aching. A great blue heron flying overhead. Feeling weak and strong at the same time. SCENE: Returning to my workplace after 6 months away for the students' graduation ceremony and feeling flooded with happiness. Remembering all the reasons I love my job and getting excited to teach in the fall. SCENE: First beach trip/long drive. Part A: laughing so hard with my sister at Crane's beach  Part B: experiencing wonder while wandering around...

A little update since it feels like a lifetime since I last wrote! After my last posting I had office visits with my surgeon and GI doctor. I shared my many symptoms and I got validation that what I had been experiencing was not normal. The next step was to do a pouchoscopy (similar to a colonoscopy) to see what was going on inside. If any of you are ever in a similar position (and I hope you will never be!), I would recommend asking for an alternative to the saline enema...talk about rubbing salt in the wound. Youch!! Anyway, the pouchoscopy revealed interesting and reassuring results: there was no inflammation in the pouch (meaning, no infections) and no inflammation higher up in the small intestine (so, no Crohn's Disease). It was exciting! Woohoo! But, then what was wrong with me??? The findings from the pouchoscopy narrowed down the problem to "pouch management." When the j-pouch is created from your small intestine it starts out with a small capacity and over time, ...

Hey friends, I haven't written in a while, so I thought I'd post a little update now that I've hit the 2 month mark. I wish I had lots of happy progress to share, but the reality is that post-surgery life has been really, really hard. I will share some of what I'm going through, but I don't have a lot of explanations as to why these things are happening because I'm waiting to talk to my doctors next week. In the meantime they have been giving me medications, and I've just been blindly taking them because I need relief. I have so many questions to ask. Anyway, here's what's been happening on my end (oh bad pun...). The frequency of my BMs have not gone down to the expected levels for a person 2 months out from surgery. If I stay away from certain foods (until we meet again dear chocolate, tomato sauce, spicy cuisine), many of my days are manageable. Well, to be more precise, they're partly manageable because I modify my lifestyle. I basically st...

It's just over two weeks since surgery and some people have been asking how I'm doing. It's actually a hard question to answer because 1. It's a lot of gross bathroom talk 2. My mood changes rapidly some days 3. It's not easy to see day to day progress. So here's my best attempt to explain how I'm doing that's more in depth than my vague "getting there..." text reply. (And by the way, it's fine to keep asking me this question! It's a good question!) This is a different type of recovery compared to my operation in December. In December, things were dramatic: waking up with an ostomy! Tasting new foods! Being out of work! Also, progress was measurable and quick: reducing steroids, increasing walking distance, gaining strength. This surgery brought me down to the basics, I had to relearn how to walk, eat, and go to the bathroom.  This time around is more subtle. I have good strength and my body feels healthy most of the time. I ha...

For friends and family who are not on Facebook, I just wanted to let you know that I got discharged from the hospital Saturday morning and I'm spending some time at my parents' place for now. My surgery went smoothly and recovery is going as well as to be expected. Thanks again for your continued healing vibes and words of encouragement and support!

It's finally here! My reconnection surgery is tomorrow! I never thought I would be this excited about going to the hospital, but I am r.e.a.d.y. The last couple of weeks have been particularly trying, and my countdown to March 21 has helped me stay focused. If you'd like to send positive thoughts and wishes around 1:30pm, I'd definitely appreciate the love! Tomorrow's surgery is a less invasive procedure than the first one, and once again I'll be at the hospital for a few days and then spend some time at my parents' place (thank goodness for family help!). Even though it's initially an easier recovery from surgery, I'm not so naive to think everything will be peachy keen. From what I've heard, it takes 6-12 months to fully adjust to the new plumbing and the first 2 months are the hardest. This is definitely going to require endless Patience and Compassion, but we have all been good friends for a while now :) I'm not looking forward to accidents...

I have distinct memories about my life one year ago. One year ago in January I was on a train to NYC midweek trying to get into a Fecal Microbiota Transplant (FMT) clinical trial- it turned out to be poorly run and not a good match for my needs, so I didn't participate. One year ago in February I visited my parents in Florida. On my second day at the beach instead of adopting the "Sanibel Stoop" (seashell collector position) or watching the pairs of dolphins play, I whipped out a printout of the detailed medical option flowchart I had been obsessively working on and asked my parents to help me work through my options. I was sick and feeling desperate. One year ago in March I was low energy, not sleeping well, stressed at work, and spending my free time cooking SCD-legal meals since that's all my gut could tolerate. Despite being on a rainbow assortment of medications, herbal supplements, and vitamins, I was suffering on a daily basis. And then, exactly one ye...